Some of us live with the constant pressure of needing to be perfect ... at everything ... all the time. For myself, I found this truly painful to try to uphold. I realized the intention behind it was to prove myself good enough to let go of all the judgments. That result never came. So finally, after diving into the eye of that needle, taking a really close look at what I was doing and the torture I caused myself in this pressurized living, I focused in on another intention: LOVE THE ME OF THE MOMENT... whoever I am now - and whatever I'm doing now.
I realized that we are all always doing the best we can based on our beliefs - and therefore, why wouldn't I be lovable, however I performed?! Unless, of course, I decided to believe I was unlovable. But I've concluded that actually, everyone is lovable; people are just unhappy at times and then do actions from that place of unhappiness. I have worked with thousands of people who continually pressure themselves - and they tell me that the purpose is to make themselves better. Hmmm! I noticed that whenever I judged or pressured myself, it never made me better; in fact, I felt worse, and then had less energy, and less clarity, and thus performed less effectively than when I felt accepting and loving of myself. This seems to me to be especially prevalent with women, which is why it is a meaningful subject we address in the Exceptional Woman Program.
So ultimately, PRESSURING DOESN'T WORK. It creates the opposite of what we want, which, truly is to feel good, excited and motivated to move passionately toward what we want.
The next time you notice you're putting on the pressure, stop and focus on what your ultimate intention is ... (to be more motivated? to try harder? to put more focus or energy into something?) and once you've identified what it is you really want, you can simply make that a bigger priority - and go for it. You'll be on your way to building a place of love inside yourself that you'll recognize as home.
With my love, Samahria
Samahria, I just love you so much!ReplyDelete
I've always tried to pressure myself into cleaning my house - and it hasn't workd! - mostly I just got SOOOO tired - way to tired to do any cleaning.
This sunday I realised something: the last weeks I've spend my weekends volenteering for people with muscular dystrophy, doing this was much more important to me than having a clean home. - so now I'll clean whenever that is the most important to me.
(Certified Option Proces Mentor)