From Bears: Passion and Persistence

Passion & Persistence: If we want to be a force of nature, then we not only require clarity and conviction, but the willingness to throw ourselves into whatever we care about. Passion is giving it our "all," with excitement and enthusiasm. Persistence is going for it over and over; to keeping going for what we want no matter what the evidence. Believe in our dreams, in what could be rather than what is.

Love, Bears

Comments:

Alison S. T. - I was just trying to think of something to inspire my Son Rise volunteers in our team meeting tonight and this is perfect!!!! They are a fabulous group who are turning out on a bank holiday evening in a thunder storm to review and plan for the next two weeks.

Thanks for the inspiration, the force of nature is my aim 200%

Loving you BIG

Ashlie S. - Exactly, Bears, exactly! thank you for reminding us :)

Simone D. L. T. - Thank you so much I really needed to hear that today, I really want to learn how to keep my excitement, enthusiasm and persistence being in physical pain, I start questioning all my convictions of what I am able to do when in pain, I want to be stronger and not change my convictions while in pain. Now it has become a battle that I almost don't want the pain to go before I learn to do that. When I learn to be happy in pain then I can let the pain go, sounds crazy, I need to make time to go to an adult course, which one?

Judy M. - I love what you said above, it reminds me of what I say - Confidence is a commitment and determination from within to do anything you want no matter what! It keeps me going for what I want with passion and determination that nothing and no one not even myself can get in my way!

Bears Barry Neil Kaufman - Simone: Consider taking Inner Strength, the core two week program that is part of the Grand Summer Sequence. The other suggestion, given what you have shared, is the Optimal Self-Trust program, and like Inner Strength, it is presented at the Option Institute in early July. Also, have you read Happiness Is A Choice and Power Dialogues they would be helpful as would, actually, some of the CD's and DVD's -- there is lots that you can do now...however, the most powerful action would be to take a program and become a big-time student of yourself. Love and smiles, Bears

Ellen Y. S. - Believe in what could be, rather than what is.... ummmmmm.

Peter R. A. - Don't believe in reality, believe in what you want. Thanks for sharing that with me last week during " Empowerment: Going for and getting what you want" at the Option Institute.

Simone D. L. T. - Thank you Bears I have certainly made a goal of doing an adult Program next year as this year I have commited my Holidays to volunteering at the Son-Rise Programs in the UK. I have been talking to Alison, Rekha and Rachel about which Program I should do and I think your suggestions are great. I have read Happiness is a choice and I have Power Dialogues at my bedside as my before bed reflection, I open it at a random page every night. As I need to deal with pain right now I think I'll call the ATCA and schedulle a dialogue for myself instead of an outreach for my son. Kate was talking today about being loving to others and to herself which made me think that right now studying myself would be the best thing I could do for my son's Son-Rise Program. Thank you Bears and Kate for helping me to decide that. My dialogue with Beverley at my Intensive helped my Program immensily so I think it is time to book another one.

Poppy M. - Thank you Bears i really needed to read that today. Xxx

From Barry Neil Kaufman (Bears): Wobblers Vs. Doers

Why would we ever wobble? Be indecisive? Act confused?

All wobbling comes from fear -- to turn left or right, to say yes or no. Fear of not getting what we want, tripping, falling. Actually, the risky position is the not deciding and "not doing." When we fall, we can just get up. When we miss the mark, we can just do it again. Life can be a hesitant dance...or a daring adventure.

Love, Bears

Deborah G.
Thank you Bears. I had to give something up today, to do something else...my life.

Alison S. T.
I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not sure........only joking!!! For me, the fear is that by doing something I would make my situation worse, which of course is a judgment. But as you say, no decision is a decision, but often without clarity and therefore more risky than deciding what to do.
Deciding that the universe is benevolent is something that I have decided to learn to trust as there are then no wrong moves, and so step by step I can change the way I do things.

Penya S.
really great bears -- very inspiring, like you!

Don K.
No excuses, just more "daring" and more "adventure". Thanks. Love, DK.

Winden R.
I AM A WOBBLER! Holy cow. Boy am I ever! But.... I know when I am doing it, I know that somehow I am taking care of myself and I don't judge it anymore as bad. That's a start I suppose! Thank you for the reminder Bears. See you in November.

Tauska T.
Wibble, wobble, wobble, wome...time for this one to come home!
Thanx Bears!

Roberta R.
I'm for daring adventure! Love the "wobbling" metaphor. Thank you for your post Bears.

Catherine H.-P.
Wow! So this is a message I needed to here RIGHT NOW. Stand back fear...this wobbler is going to do something. Thanks again for shining a light!

Jyldyz W.
Bears, thank you! It feels like it's the first time I've actually not only understood what wobbling means but began to totally see how I've been doing it in my life...not all my life...but definitely the past few years and how this fear of ...making the wrong move kept me stuck. You are absolutely right! It is The RISKIEST POSITION of ALL! THANK YOU!
Winden, I'm SO joining your club:-) Although, unlike you, I've yet to learn Not to judge it as bad and to understand what is it that I'm actually trying to take care of by wobbling. Can we form a dialogue on this:-)

Corbie M.
Every single day of this course has brought so many WOWS! In only three days (so far) I have dispensed with fears that have followed me for years, and have owned for the very first time how much I believe in ME. Thank you, Bears!

Winden R.
Jyldyz! Hello sweet you! I have an idea! Sign up for Empowering Yourself in November. What a PERFECT program to de-wobble ourselves. I am already going. Can you!? I would LOVE to catch up.

April S.
I could give wabbler lessons. The reason why i do it is b/c going left or going right look equally good (or equally bad) to me. I'm waiting for something to tip the scale. BUT, the great part of it is that now I am MUCH more comfortable being in wabble mode. I.e. not judging it. Like, hey, cool, I have a choice to go left or right.

Neal E.
Life's "dramas and traumas" are created because of your own in-congruency of personal truth, emotional expression and daily actions... LIVE TO LIBERATE YOURSELF.... NOT TO PLEASE OTHERS! The fear of what you WILL LOSE by being true to yourself will NEVER out way the BENEFITS you'll gain from being in alignment with your HEART AND SOUL! ~ Bret Treadwell

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind! ~ Dr. Seuss

Be comfortable with who you are even if that changes by the minute. ~ Neal Elefant

Priya P.
tnx for the reminder:)

Gail B. F.
Bears, I am so much more confident at making decisions these days. Between coming to Fearless in the Spring and then following up with Optimal Self Trust this summer, I feel a whole new infrastructure with my decision making. I have minimized the whole process of self-questioning etc..to at least 1/2 of what I used to do. I feel much more in touch with who I am, what I want and most of all happy with the decisions that I make or have made instead of beating myself up about them. SIGH what a relief; a much more comfortable way to live. So much love and gratitude!

To Everyone: Thanks for enriching these sharings with your thoughts, self-reflection, authenticity and love. I am very blessed for all your kindness and caring. Love, Bears

FROM BEARS: Thank you...

THANK YOU... to everyone who comes to our programs, who writes to me after you read one of my books & who posts the most delicious, thoughtful & loving notations on my Facebook wall. THANK YOU for all the kindness & tender thoughts/for being part of my extended family. WE HAVE ALL CHANGED BECAUSE WE BELIEVED WE COULD. Love, Bears

HappyRon H.
Thanks for everything bro!

Stephanie C. S.
and thank YOU and your amazing family for your love,generosity,honesty and ability to truly be present.

Diana P. S.
Thank YOU for everything you share with us!

Bernadette G.
And Thank God for you, your family and your ability to share you belief with us. God's blessings on you all x

Colleen F. E.
I CAN'T WAIT to attend my next program...Empower Yourself in May!!! I'm there some days and "wobble" more other days. I can't wait to be rock solid!!!!

Avak Alan B.
HIP HIP HOORAY to everybody!! :))

Vanessa H. H.
We are so excited to come to the Intensive. Just three more days.

Brian M.
Thank you Bears--It has been an incredible year since my February Start-Up, Mary Ellen's June Start-Up, my Calm Amid Chaos, Mary Ellen's New Frontiers and listening to your cd's until some of them wore out. Best of all is Noah's progress with the best yet to come as we'll all be coming for the Intensive in July. Yu guys are going to have so much fun with Noah and Noah with you.

Alison S. T.
THANK YOU BEARS for creating THE OPTION INSTITUTE so that I could come. Coming on programs has been like bringing my little ship into the harbour during a storm so that I could learn to love riding the waves. I love how there are no limits ...on anything - no limits on happiness, or love, or persistence to go after our wants, or the number of people that we can have in our extended family - I'm looking forward to coming home again next year to see you and all the other wonderful people who come there/work there, and learn some more. Love and hugs ♥

Yvette R.
At Neighbourhood Unitariian Universalist Congregation in Toronto the topic of discussion this Sunday Nov. 28 will be - "Happiness Is a Choice" and I will be sharing how finding you and your books in the early 1980's has changed my life. Spreading the word and sharing the magic that is Option !!

Natalie A.
Thanks Bears - you and your amazing family have done so much for my family where others gave up and said my son wouldn't succeed with The Son-Rise Program he is showing us all the Amazing things he can and that never to give up xxx thanks so much xxx

Christine A.
I went with my husband to the conference i'n Salford UK

Elizabeth G. Y.
You know funny you mention that. Your book "Son-Rise: The Miracle Continues" was one of the only books my library had when my son was Dx and from that day and it has been over 4 years I have never stopped believing he could get better. They actually had a few of your books and I was so impressed with your writing that I read them all including the one on death about a month before my father died. While reading it somehow me and my father got into the conversation about him dying and I started to cry. It was if God put the book in my hands and my father knew he was going to die. All of your writing brought me such great comfort. You are truely blessed as a writer and a lovely human. I loved reading your books. Whenever the question comes up as to who I would want to meet if I could meet anyone it is always your family. God Bless

Nancy R.
Dear Bears and Option Family, Thank you for your wonderful classes. I know that I have personal changed as result of your teachings. There isn't a day goes by that I don't shift my thinking/change a belief.There is a new and different person created in me each day.

Alexandra O.
THANK YOU Bears, and Samahria, and Bryn and William and Raun and Kate and Beverly and Clyde and Brian and Jan-Marie and Zoe and all of your amazing team!!!! Love to you all!!!

I better get going because I'm going to die!

From River Abel:

Roger Housden wrote in SEVEN SINS FOR A LIFE WORTH LIVING the following: “In Japan there is an entire worldview that appreciates the value of the imperfect, unfinished, and faulty. Wabi Sabi is the aesthetic view that sees beauty in the modest and humble, the irregular and earthy. It holds that beauty comes with the patina of age and in the changes that come with use. It lies in the cracks, the worn spots; in the green corrosion of bronze, the pattern of moss on a stone. The Japanese take pleasure in mistakes and imperfections.

Day by day, tiny specks of us float away. No matter which exercise or diet regimen we follow, no matter which self-help guru we believe in, nothing will dispel the reality that we are not built to last. Death is our supreme limitation, the final proof that perfection was never meant to be part of the human experience. A hundred years from now, all new people. Sooner rather than later, we shall not be here: no eyes, no nose, no ears, no tongue, no mind; no you or me—gone.

Yet knowing the extent of our limitation, feeling our soon-not-to-be-here-ness in our bones, is the best condition we can have for waking up to the miracle that we are here now at all. And if you think about it, that is the brilliance of the human design plan: The built-in “defect” is the very thing that can spur us to drink down the full draught as it comes to us. Better to taste it now, this life that we have, than to defer it to some future that may never come.”

I came across this as I was flipping through that book to help narrow down my blog topic. Contemplating my death was pretty much low on my proverbial list of things to do. I had too much unhappiness to do in past and boy oh boy, did I do it well ! Whining, moaning, finger pointing, yelling, crying, disengaging, over eating, not exercising ... blah, blah, blah ... I did a great deal of drama for years over my prior employer treatment of me. Yet I had been afraid to leave out of fear. This past spring I left as an easy decision which was rooted in the question “what do I want ?”. I wanted to leave. Period. Finally, and with great gratitude for my tenacity looking at this topic, I left after almost 28 years of employment. Months later, I continue to be comfortable and confident over this decision. No regrets. I look forward.

I have accessed my self love again and turned that up and am rockin’ with it. My desires and wants are running rampant rather than being squashed by my unhappiness. It feels wonderful to be wanting again. I see my wanting as a direct and profound connection with my level of happiness. The happier I am, the more I want. While tangible items area a small part of my wantings, they are focused more on experiences I want to have, connections with others I want to create, fears and walls I want to explore and change, a new business I’ve started and am moving towards making very successful, friends I want to see and invest in deeper relationships, travel, likely move out of the area, etc. A fun thing I want to do is to take tap dance lessons again! I’ve got a call into the dance studio that I took lessons starting when I was 8 years old as I still know the family that runs the place. Hear that ?... The music is starting ... 5, 6, 7, 8 ... I’m becoming a voracious wanter now and am tapping my way towards them !

What’s my connection with wanting and death? I just got it today. A close friend for years has shared with me that he contemplates his own death every day. Bears has mentioned “ momento morte” in a handful of programs I’ve taken. Oh ... “momento morte” ...means “remember you will die”. This was a common greeting amongst a group of monks in Italy centuries ago. Today I recognized that I got a great deal of wantings I want and I am sure I will create others too. As another friend told me “when you’re dead, you’re dead for a very long time”. I want so much. My time is limited.

As the quote above states so well“The built in "defect" ( death) is the very thing that can spur us to drink down the full draught as it comes to us. Better to taste now, this life we have, than to defer it to some future that may never come”. So raise your glass with mine and let us all go for our wantings as we're going to die!

FROM BEARS: One Step at a Time

ONE STEP AT A TIME: Holidays with our families. Diets and exercise to make us healthy. Trading in old limiting beliefs for new expansive ones. Day/Months in a Son-Rise Program playroom. Healing from illness. Living with physical/emotion/spiritual challenges. We're fully equipped --one foot in front of the other, one step at a time. Love, Bears

Don K.
:) one step at a time

Gareth B.
Or, live in the present, the power of now.... The playroom is a powerful healing place and not just for the student, the teacher also gains from the experience

Melissa F.
@Gareth, I believe the Power Of Now, is most powerful place to live, especially where autism is concerned. Thank You for sharing.
The journey of a thousand steps, begins with just one, and that is now.

Patrick L.
‎...one opportunity at a time!

Audrey W.
Thank you...I needed this reminder. Happy Thanksgiving.

Alison S. T.
One step at a time - trusting myself to keep going for the step after that and the one after that, but not needing to know right now where those steps will go to - it's all OK ♥

Carla H.
beautiful words, you have such an enlightened way of putting things. Wishing expansive coolness to you and your family this time of year. Namaste'

Ellen Y. S.
yup, one step at a time. What's "in our way" is our way.

Rifka M.
I like that!

Ruth B.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, Bears and everyone here. This is such a wonderful reminder. Here, NOW, one step at a time. This is what we have. How perfect! My boy Raffy has finally taught me this and how it actually feels to live fully in each moment. I'm still a rooky but being with him in the playroom, I am glimpsing the wonder of being present and connected with him and the whole universe! Wonderful.

Gareth B.
I also would add that the power of joining, when you completely immerse yourself is profound....

Rekha N.
wonderful thought Bears. I used to give myself just huge hurdles to jump and then judge myself for not achieving them. Now I focus on celebrating how far I have come one step at a time!x

Ricker Racker Firecracker Shish Boom Bah ! River Abel River Abel RA RA RA !!!

Dear River:

I write to give you a huge hug and a big old high five! Me? Who am I ? I am your biggest cheerleader. Through the ups and downs, I’ve been here. Actually there has never been a moment since June 1, 1994 that I have not been around. I was here before that too but you denied my existence. That date sound familiar? Yep, that was the date that you decided to stop being depressed and to be impressed with yourself. Not only is June 1 your actual birthday, it is now, as you so sweetly celebrate, your re-birthday too. Grand how that happened on the same date, huh ? A mere coincidence or expansively purposeful? I vote for the latter

Let’s get back to the ups and downs. The level of happiness and comfort you’ve created in your life has shifted throughout the years; at times buoyant and vibrant, at times you’ve crashed and burned. Frequently, you were savvy enough that as you burned in the self created flames of unhappiness, depression and anxiety, you went out of your way to amplify it as you did drama, finger pointing, tears, neediness and clinging. Dude, you wore that shroud of victimhood with style and flourish! Recognize though behind that is a heightened passion and tenacity of your creation. The same heightened passion that you’ve actualized in expressing your happiness. When you’re doing happiness, generating it with that passion and excitement, and most of all ease, your entire world becomes move vibrant. You become a beacon. You shine.

Remember that your tenacity continues to serve you well. Even during the times you’ve fallen down or danced the dance of people pleasing, you acknowledged and explored through self studentship what your were doing and why you were doing it.This has and continues to serve you well. Continue to mine yourself as your own best resource and expert. Trust. Let go. Embrace. Connect. Live alive.

The dark days and scenery you designed as the stage of your life over recent years are ended. You decided to bring them to an end. The curtain is lowered and I am doing a standing ovation in your honor. A catch phrase today is “ it’s all good”. You know it really is. That the pain and sorrow initiated and accomplished by you are the source of brilliant and significant learnings. I’m looking forward to seeing what you will do with these learnings.

Most importantly you’ve got self love going on now; I know that is the bottom line of your happiness. Some recently have not believed you or challenged you on this as untrue. What a blessing to hear that ! You’ve been using it as a way to invest in yourself, explore yourself, and to see with clarity what is most important as you move through your world. Bless them for being so useful to you in such a daring manner.

Remember to give yourself some slack, powerful wonder. While your intent is to be happy, don’t beat yourself up if your not 100% of the time.

One last thought, from me my dear friend. Risk being obvious. Risk being obvious in expressing your self love. You’ve got it going on and now make it bigger. Fan the flames of self love so powerfully that you can see me dancing around the fire, cheering you on ! Celebrating you ! Delighting in you!

With love,

River

Listen to What I Hear

FROM JAMIE: I wrote this blog on the Son-Rise blogs, but also wanted to share on the Option blog because after attending the Calm Amid Chaos course at the Option Institute I can clearly see what I learned - "Cause is in the Future," "Change is Continuous," and the "Universe is Benevolent."

This story begins in 1995. Tyler is 14 months old.

What they said:

"They" are 9 medical professionals from Neuropsychologist, Neuropsychiatirst, Medical Physician, and several Therapists. "Tyler is Severely Organic Brain Dysfunctioned. I’m sorry this happened to you. You will be lucky if she dresses herself or feeds herself. Expect nothing more. Put her in school 5 days a week. Have another baby. Get on with your life. Don't let her stop you from having a good life."

What MY ears came to hear:

WOW! HOW EXCITING! Your daughter, Tyler, has many challenges. What wonderful gifts this beautiful, curly red head little girl will give you during your journey together. Look at that awesome smile. She knows God picked you especially for her. Love her unconditionally. Accept her fully. Be non-judgmental. Know that she is doing the best she can and you are doing the best you can always. You have been blessed. Believe in possibilities. Believe in YOU, Believe in TYLER. Reach for the stars. Run your race to the end ...... As you walk with God on your journey, enjoy every step for you will have the best life ever imagined.

Tyler is now 16 years old. I have been running a Son-Rise program for 10+ years. Our journey has been amazing! She dresses herself and feeds herself and so much more. I never had another baby. I wanted to dedicate my life to Tyler. I am a single mom and I know God gave her to me especially. I am honored to have been chosen. We are walking this journey with God and so very grateful that He brought us to find the Son-Rise program. Everything I had been searching for for months. I have never looked back. I have never given up on Tyler and never will. We are running our race to the end. I truly believe that if I put Tyler in school she would never be where she is today. Son-Rise has given Tyler and I the best life ever imagined!

And so I say to you, Tyler: Thank you for all the wonderful gifts you have given me. Thank you for bringing me to the Option Institute to learn and live the teachings of the Option Process and to become the best mom I could possibly be - a Son-Rise Mom! Little did I know 10 years ago, that your diagnosis wasn’t just about me helping you, but you helping me. Thank you for continually walking this journey with me. You are truly a blessing. You have given me the best life ever imagined. I am so very proud of you and love you dearly !!!

And so I say to you, My Friends: Hear what you want to hear! Never Give Up! Run your Race to the End! Enjoy every step – it’s truly a beautiful journey when you Go Son-Rise!!!

Much Love to you ALL, Jamie

YES, YES & YES - Three Times A Charm

FROM BEARS: I am sitting near the top of a mountain with my backpack. Across from me are three people, among many, whom I adore. Samahria -- my angel, my partner, my gift from the Universe. Gerd -- a dear friend and colleague for over 20 years, an awesome Son-Rise Program teacher. Bonnie -- who started at the Institute at 23, became both a certified Son-Rise Program Teacher and Certified Option Process Mentor..and who will be 50 years old next year. We have travel many roads together. Now, we sit together with hot chocolates and a cafe late -- in the distance are huge fields and meadows with goats and cows (the cows have bells around their necks which are constantly ring like a magic improvised symphony) -- a village nestled in the valley just below -- and snow & glacier-covered peaks surrounding us.

Bonnie notices me saying, in response to one of her questions: "Yes, yes, yes." She laughs and then suggests Gerd has been saying "yes, yes, yes" as well for over the past year. The waitress returns and I ask her if she ever says "yes, yes, yes" because a previous waitress, we noticed, said "no, no, no" in response to our question. This woman said she is from France and she just needs to say "no" or "yes" once -- period. She seemed very determined. The other waitress, from Switzerland, was the one who said no three times. Then another young woman, from Germany, said she says "ya, ya, ya" three times often but doesn't know why. We all laughed. All of which didn't explain why Gerd and I have been doing it for many, many months.

I thought for some time and realized that I feel very emphatic about jumping into life...about being fully engaged and committed. So, I liked saying my yes and my yes and my yes. Would one "yes" do it -- of course. But the continued affirmed commitment felt like an every bigger embrace of the notion: "yes, thank you." We are often not in charge of what comes our way but we are always in charge of how we respond. Yes -- is the affirmation of acceptance. Thank you -- was a statue of gratitude. YES, THANK YOU (even if it wasn't what I had expected or asked for or previously wanted). Yes, thank you -- meant I would embrace it, would find the opportunity in it and make it a personal blessing. YES, YES, YES.

I smiled at Bonnie and Gerd and my lovely, Samahria. YES, YES, YES -- to all of them. Yes, I love them. Yes, I am their dear and committed friend. And, yes, I will always be there for them. It felt warm and fuzzy and an honor to show up that way.

Love and smiles, Bears

Waiting for "Difficult" to Be Over?

FROM SAMAHRIA (Samahria Lyte Kaufman): We seem to always pray for the challenges to be over. As crazy as it may sound, why do we create suffering till it ends? When it's over, is that then the only time we can say, "Ah! Now I can be happy."

What would happen if we truly opened our arms and embraced "difficult"?

After all, even when it's over, it certainly isn't the end. Somewhere down the line, we'll be getting another opportunity to learn something in our lives. We might as well give them all "Ahs!" as we encounter them... since we CAN.

Instead of saying NO (this is bad for me) to something we think we don't want, imagine we said YES (this is going to be good for me). We may not know how that will look, but we can decide there's a gain/learning/gift in this, even before we know what that will be. How will that affect how we feel when difficult comes to visit?

Never Give Up

FROM BEARS: This is about hope - love - daring - and about never giving up. Standing ovation for this woman, this woman, this awesome planetary creature. Ten wows!!!

(From Paula Aitken, Son-Rise Program Mom): My son is 23 years old. He has been doing THE SON-RISE PROGRAM for 9 months. Last 2 weeks have been amazing. He is spontaneously kissing and cuddling me lots first time since he was 4yrs old. He has picked up pens and attempted coloring in for the first time ever. He is making his own choices without being asked for first time. He has NOW said some words a few times so I know he will speak when he is ready. NEVER GIVE UP NO MATTER HOW OLD YOUR CHILD IS. You just need to believe in them.

You Have Your Own Answers

FROM BEARS (Barry Neil Kaufman): Foundational Principle #2, Option Process^® (what we teach at The Option Institute). YOU HAVE YOUR OWN ANSWERS. We often look to experts, institutions, media and the people around us for our answers. Certainly, others can contribute their thoughts and suggestions. However, we teach people that they are, in the end, their own best experts on themselves and they can access their own answers/insights/wisdom.

Imagine if each of us decided that our moms and dads and partners and teachers and counselors and friends have the best of intention in their guidance for us. But also imagine that they do not live in our skin or walk in our shoes. We are decidedly alone with our internal experiences and internal landscape (that's not bad news, but great news)...because we are also the architects of that landscape. Imagine relaxing, creating more self-acceptance, more happiness - therefore more clarity...and then deciding to ask ourselves (not anyone else)..."what do I want to do?" "How do I want to live my life- and with whom?"

Love, Bears

For decades, I have taught and used PowerDialogues to ask nonjudgmental questions of myself and uncover (and change) core beliefs which allowed me to redirect my life...and feel complete ownership and excitement for that life (as well has teach others to do the same). Imagine, at the end of your life, saying: "No Regrets" It’s within the reach of all of us.

Passion & Persistence

FROM BEARS (Barry Neil Kaufman): If we want to be a force of nature, then we not only require clarity and conviction, but the willingness to throw ourselves into whatever we care about.

Passion is giving it our "all," with excitement and enthusiasm. Persistence is going for it over and over; to keeping going for what we want no matter what the evidence. Believe is our dreams, in what could be rather than what is.

Love, Bears

Love First, Act Second!

An Email from Ethan!
Hi Bears
When I went of to Afghanistan I had no idea what I was going to do there. Now it seems that there is no stop for what is possible.

A job that I have tomorrow is that will be the head of a negotiation of the rent of our camp Armadillo with some of the local nationals. They are 5 brothers who are strongly disagreeing with each other about who owns what and what that is worth. Somehow I know that the brothers are going to fight each other tomorrow, but still I feel this relaxed sensation in my stomach - do you want to know why?
I am going to make it my top priority to love each one of them as much as possible! Even if I will cut through in the end to end the deal I will do it lovingly and I feel so strong about it.

By making the "love first and act second"-attitude to most important thing I do here in the camp I am being a Force of Nature:

Intention: I want to love first and act second

Conviction: It feels so great to love first! I am making so many loving friends who loves me for who I am. When I love first and act second I can do no wrong and I am an athlete who are not bound by the law of gravity when I love first and act second!

Daring Action: I share myself in an environment where people traditionally are suppose to hold themselves back! I am starting of new projects that I have never dared trying before. I am loving my nearest family members when they are judgmental and I question the old way of teaching children by judgment.

Passion: I am so excited about the walk in school where 22 kids came today to learn to write their own name. And I am really excited about talking with the 5 brothers tomorrow and help them getting more happy internally with each other.

Persistence: On matter where I go I continue to see areas of my live getting more and more exciting as I bring more love into my life. Love first and act second is my key to heaven where I can see that evil is just a thin shadow of unhappiness and that everyone is doing their best with the beliefs they hold.

Thank you, Bears! Thank you for showing the path where I can choose to be love more then have love - like an attachment on facebook.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!!!!!!

Love and light form Afghanistan.
- Ethan


Response From Bears
Dear Ethan,
Thank you for your gracious word ... but thank you more for the inspiring way you are now choosing to live ... especially as a soldier in Afghanistan. How awesome that you are taking the teachings that you learned at The Option Institute about being a Force Of Nature and using it to create the clear intention to love first and act second. I have no doubt that you are a gift to so many who have come to know you ... my hope and blessings that the dispute between the 5 brothers will be softened and made easier to negotiate because of your presence and love. Ethan, know that I am rooting for you, wanting the best for you and feeling honored for us to reach across a vast portion of the planet to keep cheering for an open heart and a loving hand.
With love and ten thumbs up, Bears

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