Monday, November 16, 2009

Unhappiness: to Love or to Join?

FROM BEARS (Barry Neil Kaufman): Thought about unhappiness chosen by others: If someone I love chooses to get unhappy and I get unhappy about their unhappiness, we now have two unhappy people in the room.

Since I am free to choose my feelings and others are free to choose theirs, then my business is about my happiness or unhappiness and their business is about their happiness or unhappiness. What we can do is love them, NOT join them.

Love, Bears


  1. this is so true! it is so easy because of our past teachings to want to jump right in and be a part of another's unhapppiness as if that will actually help them to be happy. one of the teachings i learned from the son-rise wide awake program was to "Love First, Act Second." What a great reminder to stay on course of choosing happiness at any given momemnt!

  2. In theory what you say, Bears, is so obvious, but in practice it proves more probematic! I think if people could just take responsibility for their unhappiness, instead of blaming it on others, the world would be a better place! We can dream!
    All the best,
    Mark Oakley