Friday, May 6, 2011

How Can I Love This?

From David:

I have learned from the Option Process that my thoughts are the building blocks of my experience. If I change a negative outlook of something into a positive one, I am giving myself comfort, love, a gift! The power of thinking is not to be underestimated. And as Spider-Man fans know, "with great power comes great responsibility"!

The other evening, I was pushing Devin (5) and Eidan (7) around the yard in Eidan's wheelchair, with Devin sitting on the bar behind Eidan's seat. We raced around for, um, not a long time, before the muscles in my arms began to cramp up from simultaneously holding up Devin's weight and pushing. I felt myself shift - from having a great time to being tense and uncomfortable. Having created a shortcut for myself to the question, "How can I love this?", the tension was released as objective thought was given center stage in my mind. I realized that my preference was to keep going, as the boys were giddy, alternately gliding and bouncing across the landscape as a mobile human layer cake, and I didn't want to give up my fun either. Next shortcut, to gratitude. For this moment of togetherness, the incredible Virginia spring, the exercise I was getting, and now, the return to enjoyment.

OK, fine, that's pretty easy to flip, you say. There are far greater challenges! How can I love chronic pain? How is it perfect for me that my car tires got slashed? How can I be comfortable with being terminally ill? Going bankrupt? Losing a loved one?? That's just crazy talk! No matter what it is, it's still a choice. I can feel despair, grief, anger, if I want to. It's what I want for myself that decides. No predetermined emotional responses. My hell, my waiting room, or my paradise is my own to make out of the stimuli in my awareness.

Could this idea of turning our thoughts about something around be a disguise for denial, self-deception, or outright obfuscation? Sure! Anything can be anything. Again, it's what I want for myself that decides. And I want comfort and happiness for myself. I believe it's possible to love anything. That's why I am a fan of the question, "How can I love this?" It's flippin' awesome.

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