An all or nothing deal
Change - change is an all or nothing deal.
We can change in an instant - or not at all.
"I'm on the fence" is the same as saying, "I'm not changing."
"I'm going to work on it" is the same as saying, "I'm not changing."
"I'll try" is the same as saying, "I'm not changing."
Change is an all or nothing deal. You either change or you don't. And
that change does happen in an instant. You don't need time, you just need
to decide.
Of course none of us can escape certain change. The clock ticks, the seasons change.
But the change I'm talking about is the potential to change ourselves that we all
have control over: Become more empowered, lose that weight, change that job, let go
of that anger, express more love, open up - the list goes on and on. If you say you want
to change something in yourself, remember, you either do it, or you don't.
It's that simple. Then the question is, what do you want? If you really want to
change, what are you waiting for???
I'd love to read your comments -- just click on the "comments" button just after my name below.
Clyde
Thanks for writing this Clyde. I absolutely agree. I recently decided to express my love more demonstrably by being more honest, affectionate, and compassionate.
ReplyDeleteThanks for writing this Clyde! I agree and decide to demonstrate my love by being more honest, affectionate, and compassionate.
ReplyDeleteHurrah for you! I believe there is never anything to risk by loving. What has been your experience since you have become more honest, affectionate and compassionate? Two ways - How do you feel when you are more open in this way? and how have otheres responded to you?
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments.
Clyde
Hi Clyde,
ReplyDeleteIt's been a while since I was at Option, and being out of the all-encompassing attitude of support there has provided me with the opportunity to practice what I learned there in an environment which isn't quite as accepting of the Option concepts and doesn't give me continual reminders of staying in the attitude. Most of my belief adjustments and dialoguing comes solely from within myself now, as even the people hosting our informal Option support group discontinued them. This leads me to take particular interest in the concept of "trying" versus "doing". I have to admit that I have softened in my attitude toward this since being at Option, because I have found it hard, as a one-woman support system, to always maintain a positive attitude. I find I "try" to maintain the level of internal strength in beliefs that empower me, because it is a continuing internal dialogue of adjusting the beliefs that mimic the background noise of my life- the people who tell me "You are going to have a hard time finding another job. You should take whatever you can find", or "I'm not attracted to you", or "You need to call me more...". Amid all these stimuli, I still frequently work (aka "try") to adjust the unhelpful beliefs that well up in me. And I think it's OK. I think it is OK for me to "try" to change my beliefs and behavior, because it is not instinctual for me (yet). It is work for me, far more so than when I was at the Option Institute, where the environment supports this whole way of thinking. Initially, I judged myself for not being able to maintain the level of clarity I had at Option, and tried even harder. But that's not helpful either. I don't know what the answer is. My experience is that it is often "trying" out here for me, because I don't always "get it" right away and circle back to examine a belief when I don't feel good. And sometimes it takes revisiting a belief several times for me to get to the root.
Anyway, this post is good food for thought. If I am "trying" to change a belief, does that mean I do not really want to change it?...The truth is, I am somehow having a hard time getting back into that complete Option attitude "out here" in the world. I find I am often "trying" to remember the lessons and to reconnect to that internal voice, amid the din of the world around me.
Hi Mieke, Thanks for your response. My first thought is to stay connected to people and ways of thinking that support your happiness. I believe using our blogs can help you. There are also so many great CDs available now to help. Calm Amid Chaos, the program and the CD, can help you "amid the din of the world around you." Stay in touch. But most important, stay in touch with yourself!
ReplyDeleteUse the Stimulus/Belief/Response model to continue to be a student of yourself. Read all of our blogs. They will help.