Sunday, January 31, 2010

From Pessy: Making Happiness "Stick"

From Pessy: I've been wondering lately why my choice to be happy wasn't sticking, why it wasn't smooth, consistent, natural. After all, I've been to a few programs at the Option Institute. I understand the "Stimulus, Belief, Response" model which explains that there is a belief which I can hold that fuels my response to stimulus. I've put into practice so many things that I've learned empowering me to choose happiness. Lately though, my happiness just doesn't seem to "stick". If I choose happiness it doesn't last long. I've kind of been feeling like a deflating balloon!

So, I chose to take a deeper look into myself, and understand what was going on. I chose to explore using The Option Process® Dialogue with an Option friend of mine, Kathleen (who has just received her Mentor Certification. Congratulations to all of the graduates!)

"So, what would you like to explore?", Kathleen asked. I began to share how I was frustrating myself because my choice to be happy just wasn't sticking! With a few more helpful questions from Kathleen I began to get more specific with my thoughts. Then I had a breakthrough!

Happiness doesn't "stick"!

Although I may have said it a thousand times at least, I heard myself saying once again, "Happiness is a choice. Happiness isn't something that "just happens" or something that "sticks". Happiness is something I create within myself, if, and only if, that's what I choose to do!" Every time I remind myself that my happiness is up to me in each moment, I discover that I can decide to be happy in a deeper way and in more challenging situations. It's as if I'm playing some kind of arcade game with advancing levels.

In Level 1 I can start off choosing happiness in my own world, a world that involves only me and the stimulus I choose to bring into it. Then, once I've mastered my foundation of choosing happiness for myself in "my world" G-d throws stimulus into the picture that I wasn't expecting. For example, an unexpected situation, a red light when I'm running late, a blackout, things that are not in my control. But that's ok. Even in those situations I believe I can choose my happiness. I can believe that these things are happening for my benefit. It's all good! But then I advance again. Then G-d says, "Pessy, you're ready for the next level." But I don't know He said this. It comes without warning! The stimulus begins to involve interaction with...people! Yup, I said it. People. My challenge is definitely making happiness "stick" when the people around me don't believe that happiness is a choice, making happiness "stick" when the people I surround myself with choose grumpiness, sadness, anger, and dissatisfaction as tools to live their lives.

So as I explored I realized that even in those situations happiness won't "stick" no matter how many times I've chosen happiness before! I have the ability and the opportunity to create my happiness, now, in each moment, with each person I come into contact with! Just sharing this with you is like a breath of fresh air! How wonderful it is to be able to choose happiness in any given circumstance or relationship?!

Just because I choose happiness in one particular moment doesn't mean it will "stick" during the moments to come. Each moment is a brand new chance that I am blessed with to decide, again or not, whether I want to be happy.

Wishing you joy and blessings,


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